finding the perfect job...

okay...so I've been thinking a lot lately about what I wanna be when I grow up.
So far...I've narrowed it down to this:

I'd like to wear a mascot costume like a badger or a beaver or a bear or something like that.
I'd like to NOT have to do acrobatics...and in fact would prefer to be on wheels, if possible. Like a super deluxe wheelchair or a Rascal. I think a real handicapped person would probably feel exploited if he/she had to wear a goofy costume...so it's not like I'd be taking the job away from someone that'd already have it...I could promote handy-special awareness or something like that.

OR...

I'd like to be the person that comes up with wacky names for soup.
Like: "noodle-y noodle chicken chunk"